Embraced (Eternal Balance) Read online

  “We must find a Pure,” Michael continued. “If we kill it and claim its energy, then we will have the power to go home.”

  Again the area changed. This time Sam and I stood in front of…Sam. Another her, anyway. And another me. We were as we were today, even dressed in the same clothing. Sam stood between Michael and me. She was backlit by an unyielding glow, and both Michael and I had one of her wrists in our hands, playing tug of war.

  On my side, the glow around her changed red, while on Michael’s side, it turned brighter and whiter. “Okay,” the real Sam said, stepping closer and squinting against the light. “Out of everything, this makes the least sense.”

  “It makes perfect sense. Don’t you get it?” I turned away from the vision and grabbed her hands. “Heaven and hell fighting over you. Tearing you apart to use for their own ends.”

  A small noise escaped her throat, her skin paling. Vision Sam’s eyes popped open. She jerked from Michael’s and my grasp like it was nothing, bringing her hands to wrap around each of our necks. Throwing back her head, she let out an unworldly howl, and as we watched, both Michael and I turned to ash.

  Sam was quiet for a moment. The expression on her face lingered between surprise and terror. “What the hell was that supposed to mean?”

  “I dunno, but there’s something I need to tell you,” I said, not really wanting to continue. She needed to know. Deserved to know. The problem was, I knew that after she found out the truth, she’d see her parent’s death as her fault. But I’d seen it for a reason. Her parentage must have had some significance. “A few of the things I saw—” Shit. How was I supposed to spit this out?

  “Saw?”

  “I don’t think the Merrick’s were your parents.” Smooth, asshole. Real smooth. “Not biologically.”

  She shook her head and laughed. “No way. You must have misunderstood. Of course they’re my parents.”

  The light faded and the vision Michael, Sam, and me disappeared, leaving us alone. “I saw them talking. They were afraid your real parents would try to take you back.”

  She shook her head, grin fading. “I would know if that were true.”

  “I’m afraid it is true,” Michael said. He was in front of us now, arms folded and mouth set in a grim line.

  Sam opened her mouth, then closed it for a moment. Holding up her hand, she said, “I’m assuming we did what you wanted. Can you tell me how to remove this now?”

  “Not just yet,” Michael said. “I need to know you understand the gravity of your situation.”

  “The gravity?” Sam screamed. Her colors swirled, a mix of red and black. “I think the gravity of ‘if you don’t get this cuff off you’ll die’ is pretty damn clear.”

  “You are not simply Pure,” Michael said, ignoring her outburst. “Among your kind, you are special. Rare.”

  Were these assholes incapable of giving straight answers? “Rare? What does that mean?”

  The archangel shook his head, hesitating for a minute before continuing. “Sam is a special kind of Pure. In fact, I don’t know that there has ever been one like her before.”

  “What makes me so special?”

  “With the purified soul of two Pure parents, she is unique. That is multiplied by the fact that she died and lives again, and also because she is the last in her line.”

  “Last in my line? But what if I have a child? You said this runs for generations. Why wouldn’t it be Pure?”

  “Your birth parents destroyed both their lines, ending each with you.”

  “How—” Sam was confused, and I didn’t blame her. She still didn’t know the whole story.

  “They told the demons where to find you,” I supplied. Turning to Michael, I added, “That’s what did it, isn’t it?”

  Michael nodded. “That crime dissolved the last of the purified soul in both of them, and nullified future generations.”

  “They told—why would they do that?” Sam took a step away from us and ran both hands through her hair. The murky colors swirling around her head grew bolder and bleaker. “And my parents—the Merricks. It was me. They died because of me…”

  Michael frowned. “Your birth parents are responsible for the deaths of the Merricks—not you. Since there is no way for a demon, or an angel for that matter, to tell which human souls are Pure until they die, they needed help. Without them, the demons would have never found you as a child, Sam.”

  “But they were Pures themselves,” Sam said, confused. “And they were obviously still alive, so how did the demons find them?”

  He shook his head slowly. “They knew what they were. In life, as a Pure grows, they have a predilection toward either good or evil. I’m sad to say, your parents leaned toward the darker side of their nature. They sought out the demons and offered to sell your location”

  Sam looked sick. “But why would they do that?”

  “Money, power—the exact nature of the exchange is unknown to me.”

  “So the Merricks sacrificed their lives to keep me hidden,” she whispered. “And it was all for nothing.”

  “You shouldn’t look at it like that.” The angel’s voice softened, and for a second, he looked as though he felt sorry for her. “Paul and Toni Merrick enabled you to survive into adulthood. That’s no small feat for your kind. They gave you a chance to grow and become someone who could take care of herself.”

  “Yep.” Sam threw her hands into the air. “And then I went and essentially killed myself, undoing everything. Just awesome.”

  “Yes,” Michael said. “Now you’re as bright as the sun to both angels and demons. But remember that there is always a choice. Heaven and hell want to use you, but because you have been activated, they cannot do so without your consent.”

  Sam laughed. “Well then, problem solved. I’m not consenting to shit.”

  “Ah, but it’s more complicated than that.” He began to pace. “The reason I showed you the things I did was so that you would understand. Choices are not something always made as freely as it would seem. There are outside influences, connections and attachments to take into consideration, small, unseen nudges—”

  Sam’s skin grew pale, and I reached for her hand. “What? What am I missing?”

  “Something I saw,” she said softly.

  This. This was the thing that had her so messed up when I’d found her.

  “Yes,” Michael said with a sigh. “To be claimed, the agreement need not be verbal. It simply has to be implied. Taking the bond between you and Jax into consideration, you must be fully aware of the possible outcome of your actions. All of them.”

  “What the hell is he talking about?” I whirled on Sam.

  She ignored me, still focused on Michael. “That’s why Heckle made the deal he did with Jax. It’s why we can’t be together. Because we could accidentally…”

  Again Michael nodded. “I imagine so.”

  “Then that would mean he knew.” Around her shoulders, a swirl of red exploded into the air, so dense that it nearly blotted her from my sight entirely. “He made it seem like my coming back activated was a surprise. But it couldn’t have been. Not if he made the deal before it even happened!”

  And then I understood what she was saying. Like a bolt of lightning striking me down, so many things made sense. The almost primal need I had for Sam. The nearly uncontrollable, dark desire to possess her any way I could.

  “Let me make sure I have this straight,” I said with as much calm as I could muster. Azi stirred in a mix of excitement and fury, and I tamped it down. A spike of jealousy, mixed with the sting of Heckle’s betrayal hung like a noose around my neck. “You’re saying that to claim a Pure, an angel or demon would need to—”

  “No, no,” Michael said. “But the intimate relationship, coupled with the intensity of your feelings for each other, could easily allow her to be claimed during…a moment of passion. Azirak could manipulate the situation.”

  “Well, then we won’t be crossing that line.” Sam looked
like she might throw up. I knew how she felt.

  “You must not.” The archangel’s expression was all pity, and I had the urge to wipe it away using the sole of my boot. “Because should either side get hold of you, it would not be long before you consented. Temptation would be their first attempt—which is why your relationship is dangerous. The next step would be far less pleasant. The human mind cannot fathom the depths of torture available to us.”

  “If that’s a threat…” I stepped in front of Sam, letting the rest of the sentence linger between us. “In that fucked up vision quest you just sent Sam and me on, you showed us that you needed someone like Sam to go home. If you think I’m going to let you—”

  “Like the demons, some of the angels were cast out as well. I among them.” His lips pulled downward. “Like Lucifer, I started a rebellion, though not to the same extent. I, and about twenty others, were banished from heaven, doomed to walk the earth for ten thousand years.”

  “And?”

  “And, if you’re asking me if I plan to use Sam to get back into heaven, the answer is no.”

  “Why?” she asked. “Not that I’d be a willing volunteer, but if I’m the way for you to get back, then why not do it?”

  “I’ve been here a long time. I see that I was wrong in challenging God’s will. I accept my fate and will not fight my punishment. But the others are not quite so resolved. They feel their comeuppance was too severe.”

  Sam seemed to think about this for a moment before taking a deep breath. “Okay, so what was the point in showing us all that crap?”

  “As I said, you needed to understand certain things in order to make a choice”

  “Choice?” Sam said. “What choice?”

  “How long do you think it will be before one side or the other finds you? How long do you believe you can keep running?” He took a deep breath. “I can smell the link. It will be your undoing.”

  “I’ll protect her,” I said, as Azi flashed an image of me facing off against the armies of heaven and hell to keep Sam safe. Then, in another flash, it stood side by side with the cloaked female demon, each holding a chain wrapped around Sam’s neck. “Just get the damn cuff off so we can be on our way.”

  “I’m sorry. That won’t be possible.”

  “What?” Sam and I both exclaimed. She looked from him to her arm. “But you said—”

  “I said I would help you. And I will. I cannot remove the cuff, but under the right circumstance, one of you can.”

  “You bastard!” Sam started forward, but I grabbed her arm and dragged her back.

  “I mean you no harm, and I do not wish to see you fail in your quest, but you must understand something. Despite what the bible, Heckle, or anyone else tells you, free will is an illusion. You humans are free, but you’re nothing more than pawns laid out on a chessboard between good and evil. Heaven and hell. You think the moves you make are your own, but really, you’re being nudged and twisted for millions of otherworldly purposes.”

  “I don’t believe you,” Sam said, shaking her head slowly.

  “No? Heckle is all the proof you need. He tricked you. He knew all along what would happen if he returned the Pure soul to your body.”

  “Then why do it?” I challenged. From what I knew of Heckle, it went against everything he stood for. “He said it unbalanced things.”

  “I believe he sees it as a means to an end. You take it far too personally. More than likely, Heckle did what he did to right an imbalance. I imagine he already knows how this will end. Who will claim you.”

  Sam jerked out of my grasp and stalked forward. Inches from Michael’s face she said, “No one is claiming me.”

  Michael fixed a pitying frown on her. “It is inevitable. There’s no place for you to hide now.”

  I stepped between them. “Not going to happen.”

  “I suppose only time will tell.” He leveled his gaze at me and I fought back the urge to lash out. “I think you would be surprised at the kind of motivation that comes with her kind of power. I imagine after twenty-four hours of torture, most humans would agree to anything.”

  Michael snapped his fingers. There was a weight in the room, followed by an echoing clap as darkness settled over us. The absence of light, of sound, was nearly crushing. But just as fast as it began, it was over. When it lifted, we were back outside the cabin.

  I scanned the area around and sighed. “Guess he’s done with us.”

  Chapter Sixteen

  Sam

  We were back on the steps, the huge white house again in its original, shack-like form. I let out a frustrated scream. The sound bounced off the trees and echoed through the woods with eerie resonance.

  “Feel better?” Jax, unfazed by my uncharacteristic outburst, took my hand and tugged me down the steps.

  “No,” I replied, following. We’d just wasted a chunk of time and were still sitting on square one. One of us could remove the cuff under the right circumstance? What the hell was that supposed to mean? If at all possible, Michael was even more cryptic than Heckle—and that’s something I didn’t think could happen. “Now what?”

  “We’re running out of time. I’m not sure we have a choice anymore.” He glared down at my wrist and then back at me, studying my face with concern. “How do you feel?”

  I flexed my fingers. Pins and needles shot up my arm, all the way to my shoulder. My hand was cold, like I’d been keeping it submerged in ice water. And every once in a while the cuff would constrict, sending a deep, throbbing pain rippling throughout my entire body.

  “I’m tired,” was my response. “That doesn’t necessarily mean it’s the cuff. It’s been a long day.”

  Jax didn’t answer. Instead we started back down the mountain. I wasn’t sure how long we’d been inside Michael’s freaky blast-from-the-past, but the moon was high in the sky and the temperature had dropped.

  The car came into sight before Jax spoke again. “I’ll do whatever I have to, Sammy. You know that, right?” He stopped walking as we cleared the path, and grabbed both my hands.

  I knew he meant it, but that wasn’t the issue. It wasn’t just the two of us involved in this. There was a third party to consider. One with more pull than either one of us wanted to admit. “I know. But you need to consider the alternative.”

  He pushed me away and closed the distance between him and the car.

  “Jax.” I followed.

  “Don’t.” He yanked open the door and threw himself into the driver’s seat. “Whatever defeatist crap you’re going to spout, just save it.”

  Somewhere in the world pigs were cleared for takeoff and cats were dating mice. Jax was being the positive one?

  I slid into the passenger’s seat and closed the door. As he stomped on the gas pedal, I said, “I’m going to ask you a question. Just one, and then I won’t bring it up again. Tell me the truth.”

  “Okay.”

  “Are you one hundred percent sure that you can take out Malphi?”

  Without looking my way, he let his lips twist in a grin made of his trademark confidence. “Of course I—”

  “That’s not what I mean.” I swallowed the lump forming in my throat. “Are you certain that Azirak will let you take Malphi out?”

  He clenched his jaw and gave the car more gas. We lurched forward and took the next turn fast. What bothered me most wasn’t his silence, but the feeling of utter despair I felt radiating from the link.

  Jax pulled over about three miles into Harlow. We’d driven all night and made great time, but hadn’t said much to each other during the trip. In all fairness, I slept a chunk of the way. I was tired and my muscles had begun to ache. The chill that had been confined to my hand now seemed to have spread outward, enveloping both arms, my chest, and the right side of my neck.

  It was a little after nine in the morning. I stretched and shifted in the seat as Jax killed the engine. For some reason he’d pulled into a park and ride on the edge of Flossmoor camping grounds.

&n
bsp; He didn’t say a word as he undid his seat belt and threw open the driver’s side door. “Jax?”

  No answer.

  He slammed the car door and started for the woods. I fumbled with my own belt and hurried after him.

  He must have walked a half mile into the brush before stopping beside a large boulder. Running his hands through his hair, he stalked back and forth in front of the rock, the gleam in his eyes so much more than haunted. Pausing, he threw back his head and let out a roar that was about as far from human as you could get.

  “Jax…” I said again. I took a step toward him, then froze. His eyes flickered black for several seconds before returning to their normal, stormy gray. “Please.”

  “What?” His voice was laced with acid, razor sharp and full of fury. “I can feel the demon fighting me, Sammy. It—”

  I grabbed either side of his face and tilted his head down so that I could look him in the eye. “So? Fight back. It’s what you do—what we do. Focus. Focus on me.”

  His breathing, which had been harsh and uneven, stilled. With a flurry of movement and a barely audible growl, I was off the ground and pinned against a large pine tree a few feet away. Jax’s hands on either side of my shoulders trembled slightly. “That’s a bad idea.” His eyes flashed again. Black. Gray. Black. Gray. They settled on a gray center rimmed in thick black. “Focusing on you unsettles us both.”

  He leaned into me, nuzzling my neck with the tip of his nose. I wrapped my legs tight around his waist. There was a sharp inhalation followed by a warm puff of breath and the smallest nick as he nibbled my ear. Under normal circumstances, I’d be able to see the precarious balance we were literally tripping over. I was standing at the boarding gate for a permanent vacation, for Christ’s sake. But these circumstances weren’t normal. They weren’t even manageable. I was a slave to my emotions. To his. And right then, the vibes he was giving off were heady and undeniable.

  Still, I tried. “The cuff,” I rasped, as his lips brushed my collarbone and my toes just about curled. “Malphi—”

  One of his hands came up to close around my neck. The pressure was firm, but not to the point where air was impossible. But the look in his eyes, now blacker than they’d been, replaced the heat and chased a cold shiver down my back. “—is none of your concern. As you, Samantha Merrick, are none of hers.” For an instant Jax’s fingers tightened, closing off my airway. Azi. The demon was in control. I panicked and thrashed. The reaction seemed to please it. When it released its hold, Azi wore a wicked grin. “He will never admit it, but my human likes that. The taste of your fear. He craves it in the darkest parts of his soul.”