Ruined Read online

  “How do we know it worked?” I asked, putting some distance between us. The sight and smell of her made me sick. Leaning to the left, I spat the taste of her from my mouth.

  Sadie didn’t seem insulted. She grinned and held out the stone while flexing her free hand. “Oh, baby, trust me. It worked.”

  Chapter Thirty-Four

  Sam

  “This isn’t what I wanted, Samantha. Not really. I need you to believe me.”

  I refused to answer. He’d been talking for the last forty minutes, professing his regret and insisting that things had “gotten out of hand.”

  He knelt in front of me in the dirt. The fact that he didn’t seem affected by the cold was annoying. The sun was going down, and flurries dotted the sky. The thin flannel shirt he’d given me from his closet did little to stave off the chill, and my feet were numb. The bridge had washed away in the last big storm, so we’d had to trek through the stream to get across. My socks and shoes were soaked. “I do care about you. I always have. That’s never been a lie.”

  I couldn’t hold it in any longer. I’d been giving him the silent treatment for the last few days except for the two times he demanded I speak to him. “Then why are you doing this?”

  He deflated just a bit and sighed. “This is so much bigger than Jax and me. We got a raw deal. These two demons? Zenak and Azirak? You can’t fathom the level of hate they have for each other. We have no choice. If I weren’t doing this now, it would be Jax doing it later.” His voice got darker, and he stood. “Anyway, you should thank me. Once I kill Jax, Zenak and its clan will get their power back and you’ll be safe. Another outcome wouldn’t end well for you. We’re linked, remember? The other faction is hunting you down as we speak.”

  Anger and betrayal roared in my head. It was raw and ugly and in that instant I’d never hated anyone or anything more than him. “You and Jax have no choice? Do you hear what you’re saying? Of course you do. You could choose to let me go. Break the link. You could choose to leave your brother alone. Jax did. He walked away. He felt so much anger toward you that he left everything he knew and loved to keep you safe.”

  “God,” he yelled. “You act like he’s a fucking saint. His leaving was weakness. He should have killed me that night he was standing over my bed. I knew he was there. Waiting. But he didn’t make a move.” He kicked a rock at his feet and came at me, gripping both shoulders tight and putting his face in mine. “You’re always defending him. Always talking about him like he’s a damn god. I’m the strong one. I’m the one who stayed for you. Me.”

  “Don’t you get it?” I screamed. “I don’t want you!” Deep breath. “Part of you must know that on some level. That explains the kiss in the diner. We were linked, right? You had to command me to kiss you. There’s no other way I would have ever gone there.”

  I saw it brewing in his eyes. The violent storm. “Bitch,” he spat as his hand snaked out. It caught me across the jaw, rocking my head back. I saw stars for a minute. Beads of color and ribbons of light.

  How could this be the same person I’d known my whole life? The guy who taught me how to pay beer pong and aces? The guy who loved animals and volunteered at the children’s home on Wednesday nights? His anger scared me. I’d never seen him so riled, and with the demon inside, I didn’t know what he might do if he didn’t calm down. Impulse control had never been his strong suit.

  “Jax could have taken you out at any point. Don’t you think taunting him home was risky?”

  Chase laughed. He shook his head and kicked at another small stone by my feet. The pebble rolled away, bouncing until it hit a nearby pine tree. “You’ve known Jax almost as long as I have, Samantha. He’s always struggled with what he is. He fought Azirak’s hate for me from the first moment it crept into his mind.”

  “You and this thing belong together. You’re both disgusting.”

  There was a blur of movement and his hand was at my chin, fingers digging hard into skin as his eyes flashed black, then gray again. “Careful, Samantha. My demon just barely tolerates you for my sake. Don’t give it an excuse to hurt you.”

  He held on for a moment before letting go. He paced from one end of the fort to the other. The movement was stiff and jerky. I recognized it from watching Jax. His demon was hungry. “Power, Samantha. Unbelievable power.”

  He stopped and leaned close, warm breath puffing out across my skin. He skimmed down the side of my face with the tip of his nose, sighing. “Stay with me and we can have it together. I look just like him. I wouldn’t even be offended if you pretend.”

  I leaned in close and gave him a shy smile. He returned it, bringing his lips closer. Nearly touching, I whispered, “You might be his twin, but you look nothing like him. You’re a monster—inside and out.”

  He pulled away, anger slowly changing to amusement. A flash of black, and the demon emerged. He continued backing up until he came to medium-sized branch that jutted out from the large pine tree beside him. “Fine. Have it your way. I prefer lust, but I can sustain myself on your agony just as easily.” He drew his body back, then slammed forward, ramming his shoulder into the trunk of the tree.

  Despite my best efforts, I screamed. I wobbled sideways, sliding from atop the large rock, and crumbled to the ground in a rush of pain. The world went dark for a minute, and when I could breathe again, I looked up. Chase, the demon still in control, was looming above me with a sadistic grin.

  “You were never good enough for him,” it said with a laugh.

  “Fuck you,” I spat through the pain. Silence. I wouldn’t cry out again. Wouldn’t give it the satisfaction.

  “I’m the demon. I’m the human. You’re not understanding. We’re one.”

  “Aww,” I said, forcing a smile. Involuntary tears welled as I swallowed back a painful whimper. “A cute demonic couple.”

  He hauled me from the ground by a handful of hair. That time I couldn’t help it. I screamed. The sound bounced off the mountain and echoed into the valley. “That’s more like it,” it said, pushing me against one of the trees with enough force to shake some leaves loose.

  Bending close, it closed its eyes and inhaled deeply, smiling. “We each have our favorite emotions. Azirak’s are rage and pain. Wholly unpleasant. They leave a sweet taste behind. Lust, however, is tart. Like lemons. Refreshing. The pleasures of the flesh are where my interests lie. It’s how I will feed.” Right hand falling to Chase’s belt, it slipped the buckle and undid the first button of his jeans.

  My heart stuttered, skipping a beat before hammering into hyperdrive. I had to get away. Because the alternative…? No. I bent forward, pretending to accept my fate. When the demon laughed, I struck. Kicking off the ground, I brought my right knee up as hard as possible. The connection it made was both satisfying—the bastard screamed in agony—and sickening because I felt it too. He teetered back and I doubled over and stumbled away, gasping for air.

  Something latched onto my ankle, and in a rush of dirt and air, I was on the ground and Chase was on my back. “Little bitch,” it spat. Now its voice was different. Less human. It grabbed my arms and twisted, pinning them.

  “Enough.” Jax boomed. I twisted, and in the fading sunlight, he was there. Standing at the mouth of the fort, trench coat flapping in the wind like a superhero’s cape. Larger than life, he was a mix of myth and magic made flesh and blood.

  I wouldn’t let him sacrifice himself.

  “I wasn’t sure you’d show.”

  “I’d never leave Sammy to die.” Jax stepped over a fallen tree, into the mouth of the fort, eyes never leaving mine. “Get off of her.” The command left no room for argument. “Now.”

  “Despite her less-than-friendly attitude, I’ll keep my word. She’ll be safe. I promise.” The pressure on my back disappeared, and Chase dragged me up. His voice was normal now. The demon was gone.

  “You word means shit to me,” Jax snapped, stopping a few feet from his brother. “I want a minute to say good-bye.”

&nb
sp; A plan. He had to have a plan. The Jax I knew would never just give up. He’d be smart enough to know that if he died, I would never be free.

  Chase shrugged and stepped back. “Don’t see what it could hurt. She can’t leave, and if you make a move I don’t like, I’ll plunge a knife right into my heart.”

  “I’d never risk it,” Jax replied.

  “And that’s exactly why we’re here, big brother. Because you were never willing to take the risk.”

  “No,” Jax said. There was a sad ring to his voice. How had we all ended up here? A few months ago my world was normal. Sure, Jax was gone, and Rick would have been sick either way, but there were no demons. No witches. No gate to hell swinging on rusted hinges. Life was simple. Now? I couldn’t imagine anything more complicated. “We’re here because you were.”

  Chase looked like he wanted to say something more, but simply nodded. “You have your good-bye. I won’t leave the area, but I will walk away. That’s all Zenak will let me do.”

  “It will have to be enough.”

  Jax waited until his brother turned away to start forward.

  “This is crazy. You can’t do this,” I whispered. Not that I cared if Chase heard. What was he going to do, stab himself again? Head rush another tree? That wouldn’t be as bad as watching him kill Jax.

  “Sammy,” he said, taking my face into his hands. There was something in it. It was smooth and cool with a slight point at the top. “I’m doing what I need to do.” As he spoke, he slid the hand, and the thing beneath it, down my cheek and over my shoulder. From there, he skimmed my arm and ended by wrapping his fingers through mine. With a single squeeze, he took his hand back, leaving me with the small object. With a pointed stare, he gave a slight nod to my pocket. Whatever it was, he wanted me to hide it.

  Ha! I knew it. A plan. Sniffling, I stuffed both hands into my pockets. “There has to be another way,” I said, keeping the charade going. No telling what Chase would do if he thought something was up.

  “I wish there was.” He pulled way and slowly mouthed, “This might hurt. But when I make my move, I need you to run.”

  I shook my head. “I can’t. He—”

  His eyes darkened. The middle of each iris turned black, leaving only a thin line around the edge gray. “Trust me, Samantha Merrick.”

  He pulled away, eyes reverting to gray, and I let my head fall forward so that our foreheads rested together. “There’s stuff I want to say…” I wasn’t acting anymore. What if something happened and he was killed? What if we both were? I’d told him how I felt, but there was so much more to it than short, simple words.

  “Tell me later, then. Over popcorn and coffee and cartoons.” He brought his hands up to either side of my face, skimming my cheeks with the tips of his fingers and threading them through my hair. When his lips met mine, it was shocking. Like being dipped into an icy lake in the middle of a snowstorm. Suddenly every inch of me was alive and desperate for his warmth like my life depended on it. His arms crushed my body closer, the kiss stealing the air, as I fought to keep my balance. It was unlike anything I’d ever experienced before. Love. So much love. Everything Jax felt for me was there in that kiss.

  A dizzying rush of images flooded my mind. Jax seeing me for the first time, at my parent’s funeral. The first time he’d crawled out onto his roof to sit with me after a nightmare. Our first day of high school. Our kiss in the fort. Him standing over Chase’s bed with a knife, fighting back the demon inside. Seeing me leaning across the table at McCarthy’s, kissing Chase.

  I saw everything. I felt everything. His thoughts and emotions in all those moments were buzzing around inside my head, inside my heart, threatening to make my head explode.

  When he pulled away, it was like he took a chunk of me with him. I could almost see it in the air as we separated, a thick, silver strand wrapped around me, connected to him. As he backed away, the silver faded, but the glow of it, faint but unmistakable, remained.

  Chapter Thirty-Five

  Jax

  The kiss left my heart thundering and the blood rushing in my ears. An unbelievable warmth filled me, slowly fading as I backed away from her. I didn’t know what it was, but everything about her was amped. Her colors were brighter, expression more telling. It was almost as though I could see inside her head. It was always intense with her, but that kiss had been the kicker. Something close to desperation came over me, and all I wanted was to touch her again. To feel that warmth. But I had something to do.

  I turned away.

  What happened in the next few moments would either save us and damn me forever, or get us both killed.

  I don’t know how, or why, but you love her…

  A picture of Sam flashed inside my head.

  I’m going to need to give you control if we have any hope of getting out of here in one piece…

  An image of Chase, lying still and bloodied at my feet.

  No. You can’t kill him. Sam will die, too…

  I felt the demon’s irritation, but oddly, also its understanding. The rage it had for Chase’s demon was there, but miraculously, the feelings it had for Sam overshadowed it. I hoped those feelings would ground my humanity and keep me from losing myself to the demon like Chase had, because I was about to gamble big.

  “Time’s up, Jax.”

  It was ironic that Chase had chosen this spot. “Of all the possible scenarios that have gone through my head over the years, this was never one of them.”

  My twin came forward and stopped a few feet away. He pulled out a gun. “You ready?”

  I couldn’t resist. “If I say no, can we take a rain check?”

  “I know you think I want to do this, but I don’t.”

  “Then don’t,” I said simply. I had to do this with as little damage as possible. The stone Sadie supplied would disturb Chase’s control over Sam, but it wouldn’t protect her from damage done to him.

  Chase raised the gun. “Good-bye, Jax.”

  “Good-bye, Chase.”

  “Stop!” A voice boomed through the trees.

  The inhuman echo bounced off the rocks and vibrated inside my chest. From the darkness beyond the fort, Heckle stepped forward, and I breathed a sigh of relief. I’d visited the bartender earlier to ask him to watch over Sam if something went wrong tonight. He agreed, but also said he had a plan. It was a risky one considering all the complicated factors of our situation, but it was all I had. I just hadn’t been sure Heckle could pull it off.

  “Zenak, I’m sure you are aware that I cannot allow you such an unfair advantage.”

  Chase bristled and lowered the gun. “The gun?” He let it fall to the ground. “Fine. I’ll kick his ass with my bare hands.”

  Heckle frowned and snapped his fingers. From above, a great flash of lightning lit up the night sky. It also illuminated the fort for several seconds. Long enough for me to see the large group of demons—at least twenty—standing in the shadows behind my brother.

  “Oh. You mean them?” Chase laughed and gave a casual shrug. “Would you believe they’re here for support?”

  “Of course,” was Heckle’s reply. “So long as you grant Jax the same liberty.” Another flash of lightning, and from the shadows behind Heckle, another group of demons came forward. I recognized several. The male and female demon from the War Zone. Azirak’s clan.

  Annoyed by the even playing field, Chase retrieved the gun and pointed it again. As he aimed, his clan came forward to circle me. The action engaged Azirak’s demons, and they, too stepped forward. One let out a horrible wail and plunged into the crowd, fingers extended toward Chase. It was cut down by his demons before it reached the halfway mark.

  And then hell broke loose.

  I closed my eyes.

  I’m ready. I’m ready to embrace you.

  “Do it!” The words exploded, and the demon inside me twitched.

  Unlike the other times Azirak took over, there was an electric hum. It unfurled deep in my chest, then spread quick
ly everywhere else.

  Alive. I’d never felt so alive.

  My eyes shot open and to my surprise, I was still in control—except I wasn’t the only one. Azirak was there, right beside me in the driver’s seat. I’d embraced the demon. It wasn’t Jax and Azirak anymore. We were one. A single being. The demon’s strength and speed were my own.

  Chase was right. This was beyond anything I could have possibly imagined. Different. Everything was different now. Colors were brighter. Noises were sharper. Smells a thousand times more potent.

  A noise rang out. The gun. I heard the click of the trigger above the chaos of the crowd, and the echoing boom as the bullet shot from the barrel. Even the whooshing noise as it split the air on its path to my head was like a song to my ears. I stepped aside. Nothing more than a slight shift in position. The bullet whizzed by, passing so close that it kicked up several strands of hair. I heard the projectile slam harmlessly into one of the trees.

  “How—” Chase let out a feral growl. “You embraced the demon.”

  “You were right, brother. It is amazing.”

  We stood there for the longest time. Brother to brother—demon to demon—as once more, war erupted around us. Azirak squirmed, but it was different now. Not a separate thing on the inside, but a part of me. It wasn’t just the demon anticipating the battle—it was me as well.

  Chase lunged forward, fingers hooked and greedy for blood. I pivoted, dodging the blow by inches, and sprinted for the large rock in the middle of the fort. Jumping, I planted my right foot down, using it to push off again. The leverage shot me into the air. As I went, I twisted my body and landed behind Chase in a crouch. A few feet away, one of Zenak’s demons tore the head from one of Azirak’s.

  Feeling Azirak’s anger over the loss of one of his own, I leaped into action without giving it a second of thought. I grabbed the demon by the throat, fingers digging into muscle, straight down to bone, and yanked. A rain of blood and gore and the demon collapsed.

  Chase roared, and when I turned, I saw he was cutting a bloody path to where Sam stood, on the edge of the crowd. She was surrounded by several of Azirak’s demons. Their backs were to him as they closed in.